When Chaos Comes Knocking

First off I must apologize for not writing more on this blog.  Life got in the way there for awhile.  We are back and will be posting more often.

Second, to discuss what happened I need a time machine...  What?  No time machines handy?  I guess you'll have to put up with me telling the story of a spewing toilet and the turmoil it caused.

Third - Just so that I have a nice three point introduction, here is the story:

The Story

It starts innocently enough.  An article I had written had just been published on The Christian Dollar When Plans Don't Work Out.  I had talked about when chaos strikes and your plans are changed or thrown out the window, turn to God and remember His Plan for you never gets thwarted. 

It's interesting how things happen to test what God has been talking to us about.

That day I walked to church for prayer and walked back, nice weather, and a good time.  I open my door and descend into our basement.  What do I discover but a pool of water about a 1/4 in deep at my entryway.  Oh boy....  Turns out that the toilet line out to the main sewer had been blocked and every time my neighbor's laundry drained, I got a flood.

After calling the landlady and getting the neighbor to stop washing clothes, I attempted to clean up.  Yeah, not having a wet vac really slowed the process down.  Then the clean up guys came and told me that the bacteria in the sewer water was dangerous and that they needed to remove the floors and sanitize.  Oh.  So you mean I need to move all my stuff out and allow you access.

Thus started a marathon packing!  We slept at my in-laws (Shout out to Richard and Julie!  You guys are a blessing!), packed up our stuff, and then moved it all into a friend's garage (Shout out to Dennis and Laura!  Thank you so very much!) with the help of some guys from church (Thanks to Darryl, Kyle, Glenn, Troy, and Devon!  You guys rock!).  From that Tuesday to the afternoon of that Sunday, we packed, moved, and cleaned.  My wife and her mother did a great job cleaning everything except the floors!

Let's take a moment and talk about how I had to deal with my ways of thinking.  I'll be honest, we both had moments where we wanted to worry and be annoyed that we were having to move.  It was tempting to think we'd be stuck staying with Brianna's parents for a long period of time, that our stuff would like hanging out in a garage, that we wouldn't find a new place, and if we did, we wouldn't be able to afford it.

However, both of us knew that God does care about us and does have plans for us.  We had to rest in God's hands, let Him be the center of our lives, and have faith that a new place would be found.  After all, we had been thinking about moving before all this happened and had started asking God for a new place for the same amount of money.  We knew that it'd take a miracle to get a place like what we wanted.  And our expectations were met...

In our searching, we had a couple leads that fell through. Then we heard about this Coop housing and that there was a two bedroom available.

Get this, that Tuesday night, a week from when I discovered the flood, we visited with the couple who makes the membership agreements.  We looked at the place and it matched everything we were asking for.  Even the ability to paint and to have a garden.  We signed the papers and got the keys.  By Saturday we were all moved in.

We've been painting and getting settled this last week.  It's almost to the point where we can feel at home.

Best thing:  Same amount of money for almost twice the space. 

Chaos came knocking.  We had to remember that God brings order.  We rested in Him.  Now we are blessed with a great place and a reminder to be focused on Him!

Meet us in the comments and tell us about what God's been doing in your lives. 

Persevering through the Desert

I've been trying to be productive the last couple of days, trying to use my computer as a tool and not as a time waster or brain sucker.  Thus I've been reading articles and working on my Inbox.  I took Gmail's claim that you never had to delete a message again.  Yeah, that might not have been a good idea.  4000+ emails takes a long time to work through. 

However, it felt like I was in a time machine, digging back into my past. I saw emails that made me think about that stage on my journey.  I thought about how sometimes I would get stuck, sometimes in circumstances, sometimes emotionally, and sometimes spiritually.  There was a period of time where I wasn't moving forward and was just spinning my tires.  I needed something to change.

Through a lot of prayer and thought, I came to the decision that God wanted me to put my faith out and take a risk.  I quit my job in Eugene, OR, and took a three and a half week road trip halfway across the US.  I used this trip to listen and try to follow what God wanted for me.  It started on the coast, figuring out that He wanted me to drive south and it continued across California, to Arizona, through Kansas and finally wrapped up in Missouri. 

I had many adventures on that trip, but there was one day that I want to share.

I was on my way from the Grand Canyon, headed up towards Colorado.  Right around Red Mesa, I was zipping along and saw a painted sign "Revival --->".  I smiled, thought that was cool and continued.  About a mile or so down the road, I realized " Oh, God, you want me to follow that sign!"  I turned around and headed back. 

Now this is in the middle of Arizona desert.  Red dirt and mesas all around.  The road was not paved and wasn't the nicest road in the world.   My assumption was that this would be in a hall or something like that, about a mile down the road.  Yeah, not so lucky.  About 3 miles I came upon a calf roping arena and yes, there were people roping calves.  I stopped and asked where this revival thing was. I got vague directions that really didn't help.

Back in the car I go and I start thinking.  My gas gauge was getting low and I was yet to see anymore signs.  I was starting to wonder about turning around and going back to the highway.  Then, I realized that this was a God moment.  Through out my life I've been willing to obey God, but my tendencies have been to only go so far and then either camp out there or turn back.  I liked my comfort zones and to push past them hurt.  Even in obedience to God, breaking those comfort walls, hurt.  But I realized this was a time to break that habit in my life.  This was the time to PERSEVERE and move forward.  God said and I needed to obey.

It wasn't 5 minutes and I see a sign.  Then, I see another sign and arrive at my destination.  The revival was on this personal property and turned out to be in Navajo!!  However, I was blessed and I got to bless others there.  They gave me a place to sleep and I left early the next morning.

I look back on this event in my life and I try to remember that when God gives us something to do, then we need to do it!  We need to push past the uncomfortableness.  We need to climb that mountain (My friend, Geno, just wrote a post about persevering in his hiking journey which inspired this post).

When I come to the areas in my life that are tough, I can get caught up in my wants at the time, but I have to persevere through   God does come through and I have seen His Hand time and time again in my journey.

What do you have to persevere through? 

What Makes a Great Marriage???

Calling all “God, My Weird Spouse, and I” readers!!! We would love some reader input and comments on this question, “What makes a great marriage?” JC and I have read through several excellent marriage books and we’ve both had great examples of good marriages in our parents, and we’ve asked a lot of questions and had some awesome advice given to us. So I think we’ve got a pretty good foundation to build a great marriage relationship on. But hey, we’ve only been married 5 months, and all the book knowledge in the world doesn’t compare to living out a great marriage over time… and I know there are a lot of you out there who have more great advice and thoughts on this. I’m going to share some of the things that we’ve found, and I hope you readers out there will chime in and expand on some of our thoughts or bring up some brand new ideas!

Here are a couple basic things that I think make a great marriage:

• Not to sound cliché and all Christian-ey, but honestly, the best thing you can do for your marriage is base it in a strong faith in God. When both husband and wife are believers and they keep God first in their lives, it truly revolutionizes how they will interact as a couple, because they’re not going to be left to rely on their own strength alone… They’re going to have God’s grace and wisdom ready and available whenever they need it, for better or for worse! My favorite piece of marriage advice so far was from JC’s best man, Reece. He said, “Remember to keep your focus on serving God and serving your spouse. When you do that, marriage is awesome!”
• Communication! You can’t really know or understand your spouse without good, open communication. When JC and I spend time together communicating, whether its 3 minutes or 3 hours, we get that little bit closer to each other, we understand each other that little bit better, and we both end up feeling secure and happy. It truly opens the door to feeling safe and having complete trust between spouses
• All that fun physical stuff! :D Yes, I mean sex…. But not just that. (Yes, I am blushing while writing this… sheesh) I mean all the other stuff too, like holding hands, giving a hug, sitting with your arm around the other one, stolen smooches, snuggling in bed… There is just something about physical affection and intimacy that makes marriage fun! I can’t imagine how a couple could be close and experience a great relationship without it… Everyone needs to feel wanted and desired and attractive to their spouse. God designed physical intimacy to exist only in marriage and there’s a reason for it – it binds you closer together as a married couple… a closeness that wouldn’t happen otherwise. So, make sure you give your spouse an extra kiss today when you see them! I know I will…
• JC and I are both firm believers that humor is essential to our relationship. We discovered early on that we shared a common sense of humor and it has made for some awesome times. Sharing a good laugh together feels good, and makes both people happy! But more than just laughing at the silly stuff in life, we’ve found that laughter makes a huge difference in our ability to deal with issues. Humor helps keep possible conflict issues in perspective. It is so easy to make mountains out of molehills if we let animosity, irritation, or offence rule… so keeping a lighter perspective helps us to see how little and/or silly some of these things are (I find this incredibly useful!) It also puts us in a way better mood to bring the issue up with the other person!
• An attitude of Camaraderie. An online dictionary defined camaraderie as “a spirit of friendly good fellowship” and “mutual trust and friendship among people who spend a lot of time together.” I like that! As a couple, you need to have an attitude that you take joy in being friends and in doing things together. Your spouse should be your best, most trusted friend… the person you love being with and fellowshipping with more than anyone else. We’ve found that even the simple things, when done together at friends, brings us even closer.

And that’s all that is coming to my head at the moment, so there you go…

So, what can you guys add? We want to hear what you think makes for a great marriage!

Looking back on 2011's good things

My friend Lisa posted on her blog about seeing miracles in 2011.  That made me think about 2011 and the various things that have happened this last year.

• The biggest is my marriage to Brianna.  We're at our 5 months of marriage mark and I'm so very happy to have this lady as my wife.  She is a support and an encourager for me.
• I'm also involved in the church, teaching Sunday school for the 1st through 5th grade.  Loving these kids and the opportunity to speak into their lives.
• We are incredibly blessed!  Our apartment is completely outfitted, and we recently realized that we really don't need anything (beyond the groceries, of course).  We are content with what we have.  Kind of a strange place to be at the beginning of our marriage, but a good place.
• We have started paying off debt.  We just got the first $1000 emergency fund saved up and starting to make extra payments to the credit cards.  It is definitely a blessing to see God's hand in providing for us!
• My family grew by marriage and I became an instant uncle!  Gabe is such a blessing and I love that little boy so much!  Looking forward to watching him grow and learn.

And now we have a new year to look forward to.  God is working in our lives and it's going to be so much fun to see how it all works out!

How about your look at 2011?  What good things happened last year?

Why The Name?

When we first started this blog, we chose the odd title of "God, My Weird Spouse, and I."  That's a very strange title I know, but there's a reason behind it. 

This world, this culture has defined "normal" as people living together, having multiple partners, having affairs during marriage and having a divorce or two or three.  Normal is spending too much time working and not enough time with your wife and family.  Normal is kids with no fathers.  Normal is....  (you fill in the blank). 

We don't want to be normal.  We want to stand out against the gray and mediocrity of the world.  We want to stand for Christ, for a Biblical worldview, for a life lived in joy and abundance because of our relationship with God.  We want to stand for sex within marriage, for a strong sense of value in our spouse's eyes.  We want to stand for a marriage where we want to be together, to do life together, where conflict is managed and used to strengthen our union.  We want to stand for an open home and for open hearts to those struggling in our community.  In other words:  We want to be WEIRD!!!

It is definitely a journey and we have a long, long, long life ahead of us.  We invite you to walk alongside us and see how our weirdness pays off in the future.